Today’s HBJ notice had an article about eLinear Solutions going out of business. The name eLinear sounded familiar so I went to their site to refresh my mind on what they do. This is the opening paragraph from the eLinear homepage:
Linear Solutions is a network-related technology solutions provider of
comprehensive, integrated security, IP telephony, and network & storage
solutions. By striving to bring additional value to each of our clients with
each project completed, eLinear brings a market-driven, entrepreneurial
approach to traditional technology services businesses, while providing single
provider accountability.
Marketing needs to take some responsibility for their challenges.
Read that second sentence out loud. I need a dictionary. And an English teacher to diagram the sentence for me. Can you think of ANYONE who
would understand that paragraph?
Speak clearly and people might buy from you. Confusion is bad.
Clarity is good. Confusion is an invitation to sales disasters. I am
not saying they failed because of their web site. I am saying that it
sure didn’t help them.
This kind of writing really irritates me. I have a few more examples on my blog, Bad Language including:
The Worst Press Release Ever
Press Release Frankenquotes
Posted on September 15, 2006 at 4:30 am.